Another hospital story:
It seems that a woman owed money to her crack dealer and so paid off her debt by having sex with him. A totally acceptable transaction in the world of crack, I'm sure you're thinking. However, she neglected to remove her tampon beforehand and came to the hospital after having had it lodged deep within for, wait for it, three days. After it was, erm, extracted, she was waiting by the payment office when she started flirting with a guy also waiting. Upon seeing what was going on, an employee in the know attempted to covertly throw "Dude, no" looks at the guy without success. Ahh young love.